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Self Induced Stress

5/9/2020

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This past week, for me, has been eventful. I have come to know myself a little more of what I can and cannot handle.

I have the regrettable habit of taking on way more than I can chew. This is because I tend to underestimate the tasks that I currently have, cause, well, I do them every day. In my mind, if I do them everyday then they will not take long and I can throw in something new daily, something to keep my mind stimulated. The problem here is that I also begin to underestimate the task that I took on too. This causes me to spread myself out way too thin and, as you might have guessed, causes some self induced stress. 

As a really good and respectful friend has said “You are not a superhero woman.” That little statement puts some things in perspective. There really was no external force putting a huge amount of pressure per say. It was just myself with my high expectations on my abilities of what I can do. The following are some ways that self induced stress is initiated.

What situations cause self induced stress?
  1. Taking on more than you can handle- I guess I’m the prime example in this. 
  2. Putting an unreasonable time constraint on goals or tasks without carefully weighing out the actual task on hand
  3. Having a little too much self confidence in your abilities (I’m literally laughing at myself here as I write this)
  4. Not allowing time in your schedule to gain distance from the work on hand.
  5. Overthinking what may happen if the task goes uncompleted. 
  6. Giving too much weight to what others may think of the finished product. This goes hand in hand with overthinking.

How do we reduce the probability of self induced stress?
There are many ways we can reduce the probability of self induced stress. Let’s take some time to look at them.
  1. Look objectively at the task on hand. Be realistic when weighing the amount of time that it will take to get the task done and how you can manage your time to better fit the situation. If you are new to the task- seek guidance of others that have done it before. They are better able to ground your thoughts and help you navigate through a realistic timeline.
  2. Depending on your skill set- you may need to do a little research before jumping in. So let’s just say the task is new and you are excited to get started (me, hahaha). If you know that there will be things that you may come across during the completion of the goal, then it would be wise to look up tips on how to complete it with a flawless finish.
  3. Make sure to allow time for distance. I’m not talking about just breaks and lunches. I’m talking about taking a full day off when you are completely frustrated to allow for your mind to relax. The most historical breakthroughs from great masters in their fields happened when they stepped away from their work after days or months of being consumed by it. At their peak, these individuals stepped back, only to gain clarity from the distance of their work.
  4. If the task that you take on seems to be highly important- you may want to stop yourself from overthinking. This is hard if you have a very over active mind with the end goal in the forefront. Do not think of it as the end all be all. Fact: your work may be the stepping stone to a bigger and greater thing. This may be the one thing that may set a foundation to build upon. It is okay if your work does not come out to exact perfection. You are not perfect either. How do you expect your task or goal to end with no flaws to adjust?
  5. Putting value in other individuals' opinion of your work comes at a price. On one hand, you may need to collaborate with others in order to get the best outcome. On the other hand, that person that you are collaborating with may not have your best intentions in mind. It is best to collaborate with a person that you trust will tell you the truth- all the while wanting to see you succeed. 

Not many of us have the ability to realize when we are the problem. It is a skill set that is gained only when you can look at yourself objectively and realize how flawed as an individual you really are. Those people that make jokes at their own expense or point out their own flaws may be thought of having a low self esteem. That is of course not the case. On the contrary, these people may highly value themselves and what talents they may possess. 

It takes courage to laugh at your flaws and learn from mistakes made. In doing so, self awareness is achieved, and you can adjust so that the behavior is modified to become a proactive response to your circumstances.

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    Author

    Yaritza Ellison has been an nurse since 2010. She has been essential to the healing process of many and seeks to continue to do so. Her passion for mental health and self help literature has lead her to launch justyari.org, where she aspires to coach young ladies navigating through work-life balance.


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