In every job, you will encounter situations in which can get a little annoying. Some of these situations can be dealt with. If you enjoy the job that you are currently in and encounter situations like these, you may want to keep the job and muscle through the problem. Here are just a few things that may cause a little friction while you are trying to make your money.
Problem: People do not like you, particularly your boss.
This usually happens for several different reasons. Co-workers may be jealous of your work ethics. Let’s face it. It is 2018 and the internet has exploded in such a way that everyone knows each other’s dirty laundry. What does this mean for you? It means that there are few people that believe in a good individual solely for the purpose that it’s the right thing to do. Therefore show your flaws. No one is expecting you to be perfect. Especially if you are new to the job. Relax a bit and show that you are not all business. Another thing to consider is your work ethic and attitude. If you are consistently late and have a bitter attitude then no wonder you boss don’t like you. It’s time for you to change. Be positive. Start thinking about the fact that you can pay your bills and feel the gratitude kick in. Give your boss credit, his job may not be as easy as you think it is. Ask him or her if there is something you can do to relieve a little of their work load. In time, their attitude towards you will change for the better.
Problem: The job is difficult to do due to limited resources.
This happens when the company has budget cuts to make or just run naturally on limited resources. This problem is actually a positive. This “problem” opens up a situation in which you can use your creative thinking. In an article that I recently read, the leading problem that makes most employees resent and ultimately quit their job is that there is no room for their creativity. The job requires a very strict procedure and there is no room for your creative skill. This problem allows you to be creative with the limited resources provided. If your solutions to the problem are good, your employer may be grateful and show you recognition for your hard work and critical thinking.
Problem: Lack of recognition
This may happen when you receive a lot of kick back from your superiors, even when you think you put 100% into a project. This situation requires reflection. Stop to think and re-evalate your work performance. This is the time to be critical. Although you may feel that you did your best, take the time to subtract your emotions from the situation and revisit the suggestions that were given. However, if there is no system in place to recognize employees then this may be a good time to use some creative thinking to start one.
There’s always one co-worker in any workplace that spreads rumors and loves to be in other people’s business. Most of these people that you encounter are unhappy in their own lives. They have been at the job long enough to be miserable in it, and are constantly unhappy. The best solution for this is to avoid gossip all together. Do not engage because that will add fuel to the problem and will add you to it. Remember you are there to provide a service for the company that you work for. You are not there to start a soap opera.
Problem: Overworking: Scheduling Conflict
This occurs when you end up over-extending yourself and have no work-life balance. There’s no time for yourself, and you end up burning yourself out. You become increasingly agitated and the quality of your work suffers. To overcome this you have to review your current schedule at work. Something in your personal life may have changed that requires more attention then it use to. In that case, it’s okay to take a minute and step back. Request a change and schedule time off, or lower the amount of work hours. If starting a new job, be sure to ask during your interview if the job requires additional hours apart those scheduled. Ask your potential employer what the actual hours of operation are. Is there room for change in a work schedule? Be sure to speak up and advocate for yourself.
In my personal opinion, any problem or situation can be managed. However, if your work life has begun to affect your personal life, it’s time to consider a change. Nothing is more important than having peace away from the stress of a job or career.
When you are young you really don’t think to much into how complicated a friendship could be. It usually starts as like this: you see another kid playing in the playground and if you are bold you walk right up and say hi. “Do you want to play with me?” Boom, you have a friendship. As an adult things become more complicated. This is certainly due to experience with other human interactions that make you double think if you are really ready to bring this person into your life. You have become smarter/wiser when it comes to reading people and their true intentions which makes you start to think logically about the person’s character. Or at least I hope you are.
Let’s be frank, no one on this earth is without flaws. In fact, there is something beautiful about having imperfections and uncertainties. It opens up areas in which another person can actually come and make your flaws their strength. They will be that missing puzzle piece in your life that you been looking for. Whether the person becomes more than just a confident or not is not for us to decide right away. However, we must not overlook the fact that this person’s open end puzzle piece leads a bigger picture of who this person is.
There are several types of people that should warrant some attention.
The Greedy: These are people who essentially are attempting to further their own agendas with your means. They seem genuinely interested in you and what your goals are. However, as time passes, you begin to see more situations that are faced with their hands out attempting to gain your wealth as theirs. This person's own spending habits may be frivolous as they try to keep an outward image of wealth in order to detour their true intention with yours. These types are generally the hardest to detect as their intentions are not set out in the forefront. No one with these types of intentions are upfront with their end game. So in order to spot a person like this it will take time. You will begin to see this type of person asking more and more from you. Whether it be your time or your money, this “friend” continues to ask more of you. They will also not take lightly to a negative response from you.
The Selfish: This type of person is the friend that does not want to share the spotlight. Any iota of you being more liked then this individual and you will see the envy ooze through their pores. This individual is usually easy to spot in social events. Their company usually consists of people that are younger then they are, as younger individuals look for guidance. They like to think that the world revolves around them and will have little regard to your time or what is going on in your life. It is only when it is convenient to them that they will reach out, usually with a situation that they cannot handle on their own and will need insight.
The Negative: This individual has so much going on in their life that they have finally given in to being perpetually negative. Everything is viewed in a negative light. They are literally hanging on your every word ready to pounce and destroy any thought process that could be positive. They have a poor outlook on life, as theirs has been hard. Usually these type of people create their own misery. They continue to bring that type of negative energy around themselves and cannot understand why they are forever having such bad luck. They do not like being around someone who is successful, as this impacts how much they themselves have failed in life. This individual may resolve in passive aggressive behavior which could damage you in the long run. However, they are easy to spot so therefore are easily avoided.
The Disloyal: An individual like this is the type that could cause a lot of damage to your base of friends. She or he has absolutely no problem running back and telling all your personal business to whoever would have time to listen. In any friendship there should be a level of trust and this person has no idea what that is. Their life revolves around who has the hottest gossip, and cannot stop talking about the next person. They do this in order to escape their own miserable reality, as this type of behavior renders no real lasting relationships in their life.
The Oversensitive: This person may be overly sensitive because of insecurities and a negative perspective of themselves. What I find ironic is that people that are very insecure with themselves work the hardest to give a perfect exterior image. For this reason, they may actually be very attractive and work hard to keep their physical image in line. However, the oversensitive nature will reveal itself when touching an area of insecurity. These areas range from professional performance to the way they speak. There is no limit to the type of insecurity an individual may have. The problem with this is that you don’t know how to speak to the person because they may see everything you say as an attack on their character.
There are tons of personality traits that can cause relationships to crumble before they start. These are just a few that I have touched upon. However, the best way to spot an individual of great potential harm is to pay close attention. Throughout my years as a nurse, I have turned back to my instincts time and time again. To be honest, they have never let me down. I have learned to let my patient’s body language and clinical facts speak louder then anything else. You must do the same. A person may never tell you what they are thinking or about to do. However, the way a person moves, speaks, and carries themselves will tell you all that there is needed to know.
When you have clearly identified that the person you have met has a personality trait that does not align with yours, then your best action is to leave. Depending on which personality trait you have encountered, you may have different options as to how to approach the detachment phase. You may choose to depart in a sudden fashion, however this will leave the individual confused. The person may then go out of their way to include you in everything. My personal favorite is not being so overt with your detachment. What this means is you gradually remove yourself from situations that may cause a re-encounter with the individual. Over time, the individual will begin to forget to invite you to events and that is okay. This is about preserving your peace of mind. If you have encountered an individual who puts your peace at jeopardy then do you really want them in your life? Be smart and be humble. Stay true to yourself and everything else will fall into place.
If you have additional stories that you would like to share regarding your past experiences with faulty friendships, please leave it in the comment section. I would like to hear your stories. Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed.
Yaritza Ellison has been an nurse since 2010. She has been essential to the healing process of many and seeks to continue to do so. Her passion for mental health and self help literature has lead her to launch justyari.org, where she aspires to coach young ladies navigating through work-life balance.